Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Day 38 : She's the Queen of Calamity

Every felt like you've stumbled upon a brick wall, or to hit a dead end in your life? When everything just seems to work against you, when the best of plans fall to bits in the tiniest of seconds. I guess I'm just starting to get paranoid about the smallest details in my oh so average life. It could very well me just me (or the instrumental version of Brighter playing in the background) but I've never felt like such a disappointment to myself and the people around me.

I don't stand out, I ain't sociable, I blend into the crowd completely, at times I feel nothing more than just a passing shadow which fades when the light ceases to exist. For those of you who know me, you'll know that I ain't exactly in the best of moods now. My head feels like it's in a million places and I'm starting to lose track of what's right and what's not.

Sometimes it just feels so good to lose yourself, let it all fade. To know nothingness and feel like an empty soul. It really helps make life so much simpler.

"Just don't give up, I'm working it out" The very tune of this starts to get me thinking a whole lot, sometimes a little bit too much.

When one door closes, another one opens. As time goes on, I can feel the subtle creaks in the air as the door is being closed. Perhaps the groundwork for a new path has been laid out. I don't know anymore. I want time to cease.

Note to self : Make a happy playlist.

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